3 Tips to Save Your Relationships

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes, 33 seconds

We only see a fraction of someone’s day.

We assume the rest — and we’re usually wrong.

Kindness grows when we choose empathy over assumption.

Here’s an illustration to help you understand this principle more:

What you see of someone’s day informs what you assume of someone’s day.

You can’t blame someone for wanting to share everything that is going well in their life, but it’s our responsibility to not fall into the trap of assuming that’s what their entire life looks like.

That’s because the reality of the situation is often very different.

This saying summarises why assumptions have no place in relationships.

This phrase by Henry Winkler couldn’t summarise this idea better.

Left unchecked, assumptions quietly eat away at connection and trust.

The antidote?

Pause, ask, and choose to believe the best instead of assuming the worst.

It’s easy to misread someone’s day - or their whole character - based on a single moment.

You saw them snap. Or show up late. Or miss a deadline.

But what you didn’t see might explain everything.

Our brains are wired for shortcuts, so we tend to fill in the blanks with assumptions.

But assumptions erode empathy and damage relationships.

If you want to take your relationships to the next level, here are 3 ways to shift from assumption to compassion:

1. Pause before you judge.
   Train yourself to notice when you’re drawing conclusions too quickly.
   Instead of “They’re lazy,” try “I wonder what’s going on.”
   Curiosity is often the first step to kindness.

2. Zoom out.
   Remember that what you see is a snapshot, not the whole film.
   Everyone has burdens they are quietly carrying - stress, grief, health issues, hard mornings.
   Widen your lens before you react.

3. Lead with softness.
   A little grace goes a long way.
   Ask how someone’s really doing. Offer a break, or a shoulder to cry on.
   Choose to give them the benefit of the doubt.
   Even one kind interaction can change the tone of someone’s entire day.

Let’s dive deeper into today’s wisdom with these 3 journal prompts:

• When have I misjudged someone based on a single moment?

• Who in my life might need extra grace today?

• What would it look like for me to lead with compassion instead of assumption?

Want to learn more about journaling? Join Journal Wiser today!

If you believe that you lack the ability to be empathetic, this short YouTube video is for you: The Truth About Empathy by Robert Greene.

In this short video, Robert Greene likens empathy to a muscle, sharing actionable advice about how you can grow a stronger empathetic mind.

He also shares some of the caveats that many people don’t think about when it comes to empathy, like whether an individual can be too empathetic.

Watch this 6-minute video here:

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Catch you in the next issue!

Thanks,
Michael