Estimated reading time: 4 minutes, 29 seconds
Ego fuels conflict. Humility helps extinguish it.
You don't have to win every argument.
Sometimes putting your ego aside is how you protect the relationship.
Today’s visual is inspired by Growth by Visuals (Hidde). Please consider checking out their work here.
We’ve all been there, right?
You’re in the midst of conflict, an argument, a disagreement, you have the power:
You can make that spiteful remark that you know will antagonise the other party
You can accept the part you played in getting to this level of conflict and apologise
What do you typically reach for: the fuel or water?
Let’s check out today’s Saying that builds upon today’s principle of wisdom:
“Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less.”
Humility isn't about making yourself small or accepting all the blame.
It's about becoming less concerned with protecting yourself and more considerate of the person in front of you.
Ego is something I continue to wrestle with.
I've spent plenty of my life being selfish, and even though those tendencies haven't magically disappeared, marriage and fatherhood have forced me to become less concerned with ‘me’ and more concerned with ‘we’.
I wish I'd learned that sooner.
Because when conflict arrives, ego has a habit of pouring fuel on the fire.
So, 3 ways to approach conflict with humility:
Own your part.
Taking responsibility doesn't mean everything was your fault.
Forget the other person's contribution to the conflict for a moment and own your actions.
Apologise for what you brought to that situation.
Step outside yourself.
Conflict tends to give you tunnel vision.
Pause and ask: “How might they be experiencing this?”
Understanding someone's perspective doesn't require you to agree with it, but can give you an appreciation for why they’re responding the way they are.
Prioritise resolution over victory.
Ask yourself what you're actually trying to achieve.
Is it to prove you're right, or improve the relationship?
Sometimes winning the argument means losing something much more important.
Humility doesn't mean becoming a pushover.
It means deciding your relationship matters more than your ego.
Let’s dive deeper into today’s wisdom with these 3 journal prompts:
When conflict arises, am I more concerned with being right or making things right?
What makes it difficult for me to admit when I'm wrong?
Where could practising greater humility improve one of my relationships?
Today’s resource is a bitesized video courtesy of Simon Sinek, sharing how you can lead with humility.
In this 3-minute video, Sinek shares a reality check that many people with egos ought to be aware of, and goes on to unpack one of the best definitions of humility that you can apply to your relationships today.
Watch this short video here:
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Thanks,
Michael