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- I’m a Failure…
Hello 4,251 friends, it’s Michael here!
Thanks for checking out this issue of the WISER Newsletter. Let’s get WISER together!
🤦♂️ “I’m a Failure…”
Does this phrase sound familiar?
Don’t worry if it does - you’re not alone. Most people will have thought this at some point in their life.
In fact, some of us struggle with this thought more than others. I found that I constantly reflected on how I didn’t meet my expectations when I was in the depths of my depression.
Fortunately I have put things into place to better manage my mental health, and part of this is having a much better understanding of failure. Allow me to share some of that with you today.
Here are 5 Frameworks to Deal with Failure:
🙅♂️ There is No Failure
The idea for this week’s issue originally came when this video of NBA player Giannis Antetokounmpo was all over my LinkedIn feed.
For those of you that missed it, a reporter asks Giannis whether he perceives his season as a failure, to which he passionately responds about how he perceives what others might consider a failure.
The full video can be found here:
I love this whole video! One quote really hammers the point home:
“It’s not a failure, it’s steps to success.”
- Giannis
It excites me to think that fans around the world, even children, who look up to this athlete that will now have a new view of failure, and it’s one that doesn’t including beating yourself up.
You may be trying to navigate through a recent experience that you view as a failure, but what would it look like if you reframed them to be steps towards success?
📉 The Pain of Failure Shrinks
In those times when it’s difficult to rationalise those experiences as steps towards success, it might bring you some solace to know that the pain of failure shrinks over time.
When we first fail it feels heavy, right?
For those of you that read my apology issue a couple of weeks ago, you’ll know that I initially exclaimed a number of expletives at my newsletter mishap the week prior.
What I didn’t admit in that issue is that a lot of those negative remarks were directed at myself for being a failure. The frustration, the embarrassment and the shame was almost overwhelming.
Though now, not even a month later, it barely hurts. Perhaps my ego is a little bruised, but that’s the extent of the damage.
I find that recognising this principle as soon as possible really helps to put things into perspective.
Yes, your failure might feel heavy right now, but fast forward a year or a month - will you even be thinking about it? What would it look like if you fast-forwarded to that mindset immediately?
❗️ Failure is Important
I was reflecting on how failure is often the catalyst for growth.
I imagine that you can name an individual that’s had an experience of failure on their rise to success.
But what if I said that the failure is often more important that the celebration of success?
Don’t take my word for it! Let’s hear from one of the greatest entrepreneurs to ever live:
“It's fine to celebrate success but it is more important to heed the lessons of failure.”
- Bill Gates
After contemplating this quote, I decided to see how important those of you that came from Twitter consider celebrating success:
How important is it to celebrate success?
— Wisdom Made Easy - Michael & Zac (@WisdomMadeEasy)
May 3, 2023
As you can see, turns out that 60% of people think it’s pretty important! So if celebrating success is very important, and it’s more important to heed the lessons of failure, then it must be VERY, VERY IMPORTANT.
There’s a lesson in every experience if you look hard enough for it, but especially in failures.
What is a failure that you’ve recently experienced? Have you found the lesson in it yet?
⌛️ Timeless Wisdom
We’ve all heard this one:
“Oh, it’s not that bad.”
We often assume that our friends are just trying to play down our failure, but they are actually inviting us to return to reality.
After all, an ancient Rome philosopher once said:
“We suffer more in imagination than in reality.”
- Seneca
Here’s a visual representation of this principle:
Recognising this, whenever I experience a setback that I might have otherwise considered to be a failure, I zoom out.
Taking the opportunity to look at something objectively often brings both clarity and peace.
Is there something that you’re dwelling on that feels like a huge failure that might not be that big of a deal?
🤷♂️ Failure Just Is
If you’ve got this far and you’re still not able to reframe the ‘failure’ that you’ve experienced, sometimes it helps to just accept it as it is.
The idea that “Failure Just Is” is one that I read (or rather listened to) in Elizabeth Day’s book Failosophy. It’s the first of her 7 key principles of failure.
“Failure is a fact, but how you respond to it is within your control.”
- Elizabeth Day
This quote was taken from the following clip where Elizabeth featured on Steven Bartlett’s The Diary of a CEO podcast:
Sometimes you have to accept that failure has happened and is now part of your story, but it’s the next chapter that truly matters.
What’s a failure that you have experienced and how did you bounce back?
❓ How do you feel about your relationship with failure?
Which of the above frameworks do you resonate with the most?
What is a recent failure that you have experienced? How can you reframe it?
Do you know someone that’s struggling with failure? Could they benefit from reading this email?
✍️ Consider journalling through the above questions yourself.
Recommendations
Here’s a couple of things that we think will compliment this week’s newsletter and will help you to get wiser:
1️⃣ The first recommendation is Elizabeth Day’s podcast How to Fail.
Elizabeth has essentially dedicated her life to educating people about how to have a healthier relationship with failure.
Her podcast invites guests to share their own personal experiences and is filled with many a useful anecdote.
Consider listening here:
2️⃣ Our second recommendation for this week’s issue is an encouragement for you to write a newsletter using beehiiv.
You have a story that people need and want to hear.
Only you have lived your life, and I guarantee that others will find your unique experience inspiring or entertaining.
To start publishing a newsletter for free, click here:
* Please note that these may be affiliation links. Purchasing through these links could support Wisdom Made Easy encourage more people to get wiser.
✍️ What We’re Working On
We’d normally take this opportunity to share what we’re working on, but can I tell you a secret?
We’re currently halfway through 3 weeks of completely scheduled content on all social media platforms!
If you’d noticed that we’ve been quite in the comments of posts on LinkedIn, Twitter and Instagram it’s because Michael is in the process of moving into his first house and Zac’s had a much deserved holiday!
Sure, we’d love to be bringing you even more content to be helping you to get wiser, but this week is one of those weeks where our personal lives have required more of our time.
As such, “What We’re Working On” is not very much, but we hope to share some more exciting projects with you in the near future.
Do you enjoy this newsletter? If so, please share it with someone! Forward this to a friend, or share it on social media!
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😊 Thank You!
Thanks for checking out this issue of the WISER Newsletter. If you have any feedback, we would love to hear it!
Simply reply to this email, and we will get back to you.
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Catch you in the next issue!
Thanks,
Michael and Zac!